Here are Week 64 @Twitstery tweets of The Golden Parachute, the amazing new sequel to Executive Severance!
We wait at a carriage stand. Travelers ahead of us hand their satchels and other luggage to drivers and climb aboard. I watch where I step.
I ask Regi “Do you notice anything unusual here?” “You mean how the drivers don’t get down off their perches to load the bags? How rude!”
We have no bags so I let it go. I can’t put my finger on something. As Dot pulls up in a carriage, my hand brushes the book in my pocket.
The ERUPT Manual! I read page one. ‘Existential Reality Update Prototype Template. The present Reality will be superseded by Version 2015.’
At the beginning of this caper Granger’s doppelganger warned of time shifts due to Reality alterations. Twitter would be my reality check.
The airport has reverted to pre-9/11 Customs checks. Now Regi and I stand in a horse and carriage line. Oddly, I still have my cell phone.
I just realized I still have my cell phone! Why is that? Everything else has changed. I take out my cell phone to check my Twitter account.
Sure enough at the end of my previous entry I wrote “Oddly, I still have my cell phone.” Why hasn’t the Reality alteration affected that?
I need to get to the bottom of this. Is this the original reality or is my memory of the original reality true and this one really false?
I don’t have time to scroll through my Twitter feed. Maybe I can get to the bottom of things by comparing my perceptions with someone else.
Dot sits atop an apparent horse and carriage. We’re carrying Granger’s cadaver to his Body Parts R Us lab. There’s no place to hide a body.
“Dot, where have you put Granger’s body in that thing?” “Nowhere. I sent it ahead in an ambulance.” “Horse powered or horse drawn?” “Huh?”
“You don’t see it either, do you?” “See what?” “Let me ask you, why are you taking Granger’s body back to Body Parts R Us?” “Back to where?”
“Back to your cloning lab.” “Cloning lab? My hospital is St. Bartholomew’s. We’re taking the body there for an autopsy.” St. Bartholomew’s?
That’s the London hospital where Sherlock Holmes met John Watson! Somehow we’ve paradigm-switched continents and eras. This is serious!
Though he might have been more humble, there’s no police like Holmes. Comforting as that is, Sherlock knows nothing about cloning. Dot did.
Unaware of the paradigm switch, Dot is practicing 19th century medicine. Without access to of his cloning lab, we can’t solve this case!
For the first time in my life I’m scared. Well, maybe not the first time but certainly the first since our pilot Orville waved a gun at me.
We must go back. I open up the ERUPT manual at random. “Beauty is no longer just skin deep, but now extends to underlying muscles as well.”
That didn’t help. I scroll through my Twitter feed. “One unanticipated consequence of a reality shift can be a phasing in and out of time.”
What else did Granger’s doppelgänger say? “I just reality-checked you with your own Tweet. That’s what’s needed as our reality is attacked.”
(The Twitter Mystery continues daily at @Twitstery)