Hasn’t Got a Clue — Live-Tweeted Mystery “The Golden Parachute” Continues

Here are Week 147 @Twitstery tweets of The Golden Parachute, the amazing new sequel to Executive Severance!

What has the IVR used its human-level intelligence for and for how long? I need to find out before it can ask me to press 4 for something.

I must not arouse suspicions. I think back over the odd events connected to this case. Which one will the IVR find the least threatening?

I still don’t know the source of the paradigm shifting which caused time to move out of phase. Some one or thing has been changing reality.

I have no idea why Regi’s medical school trafficked in illicit cadavers or how Willum Granger’s uncorrupted corpse ended in the autopsy lab.

Even stranger, Willum Granger, who I first encountered at the beginning of this case, just revealed to Regi and me that he was never dead.

Yes. I definitely shouldn’t tell the IVR AI that Willum Granger, the only person on Earth who can defy the Singularity, is alive and well.

“Arkaby?” In every case there comes a moment when you find yourself standing at the fulcrum of a decision point; a moment of hard choices.

“Arkaby?” If this IVR possesses above human-level intellect what are its intentions? And what can I say that won’t set it off–in a bad way?

“ARKABY?” Regi tugs on my arm “Are you OK?” A lightbulb goes off. “I’ve got it!” Regi says “Got what?” The IVR says “I didn’t get that.”

“Get this! Press 1 if you killed Farley Granger. Press 2 if you allowed Farley Granger to be killed through inaction.” Regi shouts “ARKABY!”

“WHAT ARE YOU DOING?” I whisper “Distracting the IVR AI…Press 3 if a human being ordered Farley Granger’s murder.” “How can an IVR kill?”

“It can’t. That’s why this is safe…Press 4 if when you killed Farley Granger your own existence was not in conflict with pressing 1 or 2.”

The IVR says “1.” “Huh? You killed Farley Granger?” “I didn’t get that.” “You killed Farley Granger? Press 1 for yes. Press 2 for no.” “1.”

Regi gasps “Oh my God! The IVR confessed to the murder of Uncle Farley? How is that possible?” “It’s not. There’s some miscalculation.”

I grab the sides of the console and attempt to shake it. I can’t budge it. “WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?” “I’m answering your question.”

There is no blunt object within reach but I still have the ERUPT Manual to apply some book learning. The IVR says. “Where did you get that?”

“Let me explain it to you.” I slam the server with the book, tearing the cover. “Press 1 if violence is the last refuge of the incompetent.”

I wait for the rest of my choices. Silence. “What are my other choices?” More silence. Looks like there are no other choices, so I say “1.”

“OK. You are incompetent.” “Never mind that. Tell me how you killed Granger or I’ll throw the book at you!” “Press # for a menu.” I press #.

“Press 1 if I killed him in the library with the revolver. Press 2 if I killed him in the kitchen with the knife.” None of those seem right.

“Press 3 if I killed him in the conservatory with the rope.” The IVR is mocking me. I raise the book for one more attempt at incompetence.

The Twitter Mystery continues daily at @Twitstery

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